


Mistaketale: This Fanfic was a Mistake

by NekoOverlord26



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Bad Puns, Gen, I'm Bad At Tagging, Memes, Mistakes, Original Character(s), Swearing, Why Did I Write This?, i’m an idiot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-23 12:42:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30055647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NekoOverlord26/pseuds/NekoOverlord26
Summary: Long ago, two races ruled over Earth,Humans and Monsters.One day an Uno War took placebetween the two races.After a long battle the Monsterswere victorious.The Humans, filled with anger, YeEteD the Monsters under a mountain.Seven of the strongest meme creators dabbed, creating a barrier, trapping the Monsters underground.Many Years Later. . .Legends say that all who climb Mt. Ebott go missing and are then labeled as “Gay”.A human climbs the mountain.They enter a cave.They trip and fall into a giant hole.The human then dabs as they fallto their “death”....A human with brown hair is lying in a bed of yellow flowers. They look around them and notice they are underground.They have fallen in “The Land of Monsters”. Their response?“Nani the frick?”(Co-writing with a friend that doesn’t have an AO3 account)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 2





	1. Falling Down Here was a Mistake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A human finds herself trapped underground. After befriending a ghost she meets the most cursed flower she ever had the displeasure of meeting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When you started making a fanfic like three years ago, posted it to a fanfic website and then create a new account on a different fanfic website a post your old fanfic because you promised yourself you would finish it one day.

Lydia woke up confused, she had a weird dream (something about Uno and mountain climbing?). She opened her eyes.. so.. it wasn’t a dream? The brunette was laying in a bed of flowers, in a large cave.

“Nani the frick?” She said to herself. That’s when she saw them, a ghost of a human girl, T-posing to assert dominance. The ghost had short blonde hair and wore a green t-shirt with a yellow stripe. The ghost glared back at her as if to say “What are you looking at?”

“Who are you?” Lydia asked.

“B*TCH I AM A GOD!”

”Well, I’m Lydia, what’s your name?”

“Sierra, the god.”

“Ok then.” They continued to stand there awkwardly, Sierra still T-posing.

No longer wanting to be in that awkward situation Lydia tried to leave, but Sierra seemed to be pulled along with her. They spent a minute both trying to get away from each other but Sierra seemed to be forced to follow Lydia.

Apparently Sierra’s ghost-soul-thing latched onto Lydia’s living SOUL and now they couldn’t be more than ten feet from each other.They looked at each other and silently agreed that they were now friends.

Together they walked/floated into the next room with. In the center was a circle of grass and in the center of that circle was a yellow flower. Wait! That flower has a face! and cat ears?

“Howdy. I’m Flowey, Flowey the flower nya~.” nope. Nope. NopE. NOPE. Lydia walked out of the room. “You know that’s kind of rude, Buddy!” Flowey’s shout echoed, “You could at least hear the speech I had planned.”

“Alright fine,” Lydia said as she reluctantly went back into the room Flowy was in. Sierra wanted to poke the flower, but was too invested in T-posing.

“So you’re new to the Underground, aren’t ‘cha?”

“Obviously,” Flowey started looking annoyed.

“Just shut up and listen,” he cleared his throat- ‘Wait do flowers have throats?’ Lydia felt a tugging sensation in her chest and suddenly a red heart appeared. “See that heart? That is your SOUL, the very culmination of your being!” Lydia attempted to hold her SOUL, but it just kind of floated above her hands.

“Your speech is kinda boring ya’ know.” Flowey breathed in and out trying - and failing- to calm down.

“Your SOUL starts off weak but can grow stronger if you gain a lot of LV. What’s LV?-” Flowey’s speech was once again interrupted.

“I didn’t ask,” Lydia said. Flowey seemed to have reached the breaking point.

“You know what that’s IT. I’m done! You are by far the most annoying human that has fallen down here! And one of them was continuously flossing! DIE nya~! *demonic laughter nya~*”

“What the heck?!?” Lydia screamed as several white pellets surrounded her body, aiming for her SOUL. A ball of fire then appeared next to Flowey. Lydia heard “Hadouken!” shouted by a voice she didn’t recognize. The ball of fire then slammed into Flowey YeETiNG him out of the room.

“Oh sh*t,” Sierra said quietly, still T-posing.

A goat monster then walked into the room, she was dabbing. Sierra looked horrified.

“What a terrible creature torturing such a poor innocent youth. Don’t be afraid my child, I am Toriel, Caretaker of the Ruins. I pass by here everyday to see if anyone has fallen down here. Come, I will guide you through the catacombs,” Toriel then started walking to the next room, still dabbing.

Having no other choice Lydia followed this strange goat mom. Sierra had stopped T-Posing out of pure terror. Looks like this goat lady had won dominance.


	2. Letting a Goat Kidnap Me was a Mistake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sierra finds a foe that is stronger and far more intimidating than even she. Meanwhile Lydia gets kidnapped by a goat.

When Lydia entered the next room the first thing she noticed was a little, yellow star. The star seemed to shine brighter, she reached out to touch it.   
  


*File Saved*

Lydia wondered what that ment and if her life was now running on video game logic. Sierra just kind of looked over at her not sure what just happened but didn’t want to press further.

Toriel took Lydia from room to room explaining how there are puzzles everywhere and stuff. They then reached a room with nothing but a dummy. 

“While you are in the Underground monsters may try to attack you. If they do then you will enter a “Fight” while in a “Fight” strike up a friendly conversation and I will come to resolve the conflict. Here you can practice talking to this dummy.” 

Lydia entered a “Fight” with the dummy and noticed she could do four different things, FIGHT, ACT, ITEM, and MERCY. 

Realizing she didn’t listen to what the goat lady to her to do Lydia whispered to Sierra for help. “What was I supposed to do again?” 

Sierra looked confused and thought for a moment before saying “Stabby stab.” 

Lydia hesitated for a second “K,” she hit the FIGHT button and somehow killed the dummy. 

Toriel looked disappointed and stopped dabbing because of it. “No, no the dummies are for talking, not killing. Well good enough, let’s continue.” Toriel started dabbing again before leaving the room. 

Sierra looks from the dummy to Lydia before saying “To be fair, I didn’t pay attention either.” Lydia couldn’t even be upset about that confession.

After a few more puzzles Toriel led Lydia into a long, empty hallway. “My child I have to ask you to walk to the end of this room alone, forgive me for this,” she then sprinted down the hall and hid behind the only thing in the room, a pillar. 

Lydia shouted down the hall “I can see you, you know that right?” Toriel either didn’t hear or chose to ignore Lydia’s words so Lydia just walked down the hall. Sierra had decided to adopt Toriel’s strategy so she followed behind Lydia dabbing. When Lydia reached where Toriel was she came out from behind the pillar. 

“Do not be afraid, my child I did not leave you. I was merely behind this pillar the whole time. There was a reason for this exercise, to test your independence. I have to leave you here while I go do things in secret. Oh! I know I’ll give you a cell phone-“ 

“I already have a phone.” Lydia said, holding up her phone, surprised it didn’t shatter when she fell. 

“Oh! Well, I’ll just add my number then.” Sierra didn’t know if her being there made it any less of an independence exercise or not.

  
  


While adding her number Toriel noticed something strange. “My child why don’t you have any contacts in your phone yet?” Lydia was both surprised and not. Well something would have had to be broken after that fall. She shrugged as answer to Toriel’s question.

“Well I better get going. Call me if you need me and don’t go anywhere.” She hugged Lydia before leaving.

Sierra rustled in her pocket and pulled out a ghost phone. She held out her hand for Lydia’s phone. Sierra then inserted her number into Lydia’s phone and called her she hung up and met Lydia’s confusion with her own “Holy sh#t, I wasn’t expecting that to work.” They walked/floated in astonished silence.

“Hey I’ve been wondering, it seems that no one else can see you. Why is that?” Lydia said looking at Sierra, who had started dabbing again.

”Uhhhh ghost physics I guess. I never thought about it. I usually have to think about appearing and stuff in front of people. I don't know.” Sierra shrugged after giving this half a$$ed explanation. 

”Huh, well that sounds like fun.” Lydia replied, lost in thought.

Lydia spent a good fifteen minutes in that hallway, either playing Minecraft or calling Toriel, either just to say “Hi” or once even asking to call her “Goat Mom”, she was ok with it. Sierra was going around the room just doing random things occasionally texting Lydia cursed images. After those fifteen minutes were up though Lydia got bored and decided to leave the room. 

When Lydia left the hall she was confronted by a weird frog creature, it started talking to her. 

“Ribbit Ribbit (Some monsters don’t want to fight you.) Ribbit Ribbit (If you fight a monster until their health is low or talk to them for a while then their name will turn yellow) Ribbit Ribbit (In these cases then can you please spare these monsters, human?)” Lydia thought for a second, first about how it was weird that she understood what the monster was saying and second how this information would be useful. 

There were two other rooms in the room Lydia was in, so she went into the room closest to her. There was a bowl of candy with the words “Take one” on it, so she did. She took the entire bowl. Then she put it back and just took one piece of candy. Sierra stuffed two handfuls into her pockets, so to the rest of the world it looked like Lydia was followed by floating candy.

Lydia left the candy room and reentered the room with the frog, just now noticing the SAVE Star. 

*Touching the star seemed to fill Lydia with DETERMINATION.* 

*FILE SAVED*

Sierra still didn’t understand why Lydia would just start staring at random objects. It was clear that only Lydia could see these floating stars.

After a while of going through the puzzles Lydia got a call from Toriel. “Hello, my child I was wondering if you preferred cinnamon or butterscotch.” 

Lydia didn’t even have to think about this question. “Butterscotch, why?” 

“No reason I was just wondering, thank you, my child,” Toriel then hung up. Lydia didn’t even take two steps before Toriel called again. 

“Hello, my child. You do not dislike cinnamon, do you? I know what your preference is but would you turn up your nose if you found it on your plate?” 

“Well I mean if it was JUST cinnamon then I would turn my nose. Not because I don’t like cinnamon but because I know from the Cinnamon Challenge that I would choke if I tried to eat just cinnamon.” Toriel paused for a moment. 

“What’s the Cinnamon Challenge?” Toriel asked hesitantly.

“This stupid challenge from a few years ago where people would take a spoon full of cinnamon and try to swallow it. The challenge usually ended with people coughing the cinnamon up again.” 

Toriel contemplated her life for a moment. “I-I see. Well thank you, my child.” Toriel hung up again. 

Sierra just turned to Lydia and said “I hope she doesn’t make you choke on cinnamon.” 

“Me too, Sierra, me too.”

In one room a ghost with afro hair and circular glasses was laying on the floor feeling like garbage. 

“Excuse me I have to get through.” Lydia said to the weird ghost but it didn’t seem to hear her, they were too busy listening to some music on their ghost phone. Lydia didn’t know what to do so she tried to just kind of gently push the ghost out of the way, but she instead started a battle between her and the ghost, whose name was Jaestablook. Sierra stares into Jaestablook’s soul with a glare and mouths you better retreat _now_. 

“What’s with your ghost friend, she’s terrifying,” Jaestablook said. 

“I didn’t realize you could even see her.” Lydia replied. 

Sierra looked at Lydia with a ‘you’re a dumba$$ look’. 

“Oh course ghosts can see other ghosts.” Jaestablook said. “Whatever, I'm going home to listen to more of BTS’s music.” 

*YOU WON?*

After that awkward encounter with Jaestablook Lydia just continued on like nothing happened. Entering the next room Lydia saw nothing but two cobwebs and a flier for a “Spider Bakesale”. For some reason Lydia felt like if she didn’t buy something later along the line someone would call her stingy and kill her, but she didn’t know why. After buying a spider doughnut Lydia felt safe enough to continue on her journey. 

Lydia and Sierra went through the rest of the puzzles until they reached a room with leaves guiding them to the left. Lydia walked past that door to the one in the back of the room, only finding a toy knife. Lydia remembered the red, fading ribbon she found earlier when she was trying to solve a puzzle. She put the ribbon in her hair but left the toy knife, she didn’t think she needed it.

Backtracking Lydia and Sierra entered the room with the leaves. 

“Oh dear that took longer than I thought.” Toriel said while pulling out her cellphone somehow still dabbing. 

Sierra just slightly whispered “She’s a witch.” While looking on in dazed amazement. That’s when Toriel noticed Lydia standing there. 

“What are you doing here, my child. I told you to stay in that room.” That’s when she noticed the “floating candy” behind Lydia and shouted the first curse word Lydia had heard from the goat lady. 

Sierra, through supernatural means, realized she was talking about her candy and just slowly took one out from her pocket and unwrapped it, slowly somehow eating it too.

Toriel seemed like she had given up. “Well I’m just glad you are alright, my child. Come I have something to show you.” Toriel then guided Lydia to a house at the end of the hall that they were in. Lydia saw another SAVE Star and decided to save before going inside. 

*Realizing you might be getting kidnaped fills you with DREAD and DETERMINATION.*

*FILE SAVED.*

Once inside Toriel took Lydia’s hand in hers and led Lydia to a door. “Surprise, my child, it is a room of your own, and I have baked you a butterscotch cinnamon pie. Um is something burning? Uh Make Yourself At Home!” Toriel started running towards what Lydia assumed was the kitchen. 

“Wait does this count as kidnapping?” Lydia asked Sierra.

”Yeah probably does, but I mean this is pretty nice for a kidnapping. Who knows? Maybe stockholm syndrome will kick in and you could have a nice life here.” She replied, taking some more candy out of her pocket. 

Then Sierra thought for a moment and looked concerned “Nevermind, maybe spend some time here than leave. If you stayed here for a while it would get boring for me. I’m pretty sure I have some sort of ghost conflict to resolve.” Lydia did the ok sign with her fingers.

Lydia looked around Toriel’s house for a while, took a nap, and got some pie. “Hey, Goat Mom, when can I go home?” Lydia asked after a while. 

“Home? Why is this your home.” 

“Wait you really are kidnapping me aren’t you?” 

“Kidnapping? Is that what you think this is? I’m protecting you. If I let you leave the ruins, then HE will kill you.” 

“What do you mean by “HE”?” Lydia asked curiously.

“Asgore, The Uno King, King of Monsters has waged war against humans, all who fall here are to die. If he kills you then he will use your SOUL to break the barrier, and a new Uno War will take place.” 

“You know what I don’t care I’m leaving anyway ‘cause for some reason I have a feeling that me being here will help break the barrier and everyone will leave peacefully. Don’t know why though I just feel like I’m the main character of a videogame. Well see ya’!” Lydia started walking towards the stairs where she assumed the exit was. 

“Wait, my child, don’t do that!” Toriel then ran past Lydia and down the stairs. Lydia followed her now positive that that was where the exit was.

Down the stairs was a long hallway and at the end of the hallway was a door. Toriel stood in front of the door. Toriel turned towards Lydia when she approached. 

“So I was going to destroy the exit but then I realised I don’t know how I’m going to do that so I’ll just let you pass.” Lydia hesitated for a second. 

“Really? You were trying so hard to stop me from leaving, but now you are just letting me go?” 

“Yeah, I trust you, my child.” Toriel stopped dabbing to give Lydia a hug before leaving the room. 

“Well let’s see what horrors await us.” Lydia said to Sierra before opening the door. 

When Lydia opened the door there was another long hallway, annoying Lydia as she hated walking. After the long hallway was another room like the one Lydia and Sierra met Flowey, speaking of which, there he was cat ears and all. 

“Clever, very clever, nya~. In this world it’s kill or be killed. So you managed to play by your own rules, you spared the life of a single person.” 

“Can you shut up for once?” Lydia said trying to walk past Flowey 

“I’ll be watching you!” Flowy shouted as Lydia left the room. 

“Why is that flower so creepy?” Questioned Sierra as they walked past. 

Lydia didn’t have an answer and was glad when she didn’t have to answer. The two girls were distracted by a giant door at the end of the hall. This must lead to the rest of the Underground. What other mistakes could this door lead to?


	3. Skeleton Puns and Cringey Memes are a Mistake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lydia meets a pair of skeletons. Somehow they are both memelords, yet in different ways? Meanwhile Sierra uses her ghost abilities to mess with people’s livelihoods.

The door opened to a snowy forest. A forest and snow inside a cave, under a mountain? Ok.

“Is there a camera in that bush?” Lydia said pointing towards the said bush. 

Sierra floated over to it. “Yeah, there’s definitely a creepy a$$ camera in here.”   
  


“Oh boy, someone’s a stalker.” Maybe it was Flowey? Nah, he was creepy enough to just silently follow behind someone instead of watching them through cameras.

The duo trudged on. Walking along the trail Lydia noticed a branch just lying there. 

“OoOh a stick,” but the stick was too heavy to carry :(. Lydia took about five steps from the stick before she heard a _CruNcH_. Turning around Lydia saw that the stick had been snapped in half, like someone had just stepped on it, but no one was around. Lydia continued forward, faster than before, until she reached a bridge with bars across it, made to keep things from going through, but the bars were too wide to stop anyone. Especially not a ghost.

Lydia then heard the crunching of snow, someone was walking up to her, but she was too scared to turn around. Lydia felt this person tap her shoulder so she turned around and was met with... a hand doing the upside down ok symbol? Lydia was confused. Sierra made only her hand appear and replied with one of her own. 

“nice.” the stranger said pointing finger guns at Sierra’s hand, not even questioning why there was a ghost hand. 

Turning back to Lydia the stranger smiled, “‘sup, kid. didn’t mean to scare ya my name’s skans, skans the skeleton.” Looking at the stranger Lydia noticed that although this “Skans” person had the face of a human girl with dark skin, brown eyes, and long brown almost black hair, everywhere else was skeleton bones. It would be creepy (well even more creepy) if everyone in this story wasn’t depicted as cartoon characters. Skans was wearing a blue jacket over a white t-shirt, black gym shorts, and pink slippers.

“What the heck kind of name is ‘Skans’?” Lydia asked, before realizing that was rude. 

Skans shrugged, “combination of two names, it’s the same for my brother, conrus. speaking of which, i think that’s him over there. you should probably hide behind that conveniently shaped lamp over there before he tries to capture you.” Skans pointed Lydia in the direction of a lamp conveniently shaped exactly like her. Right after Lydia got behind the lamp a taller skeleton came running up to Skans. 

“SKANS WHAT THE F**K?!?” 

“‘sup, bro.” 

“DON’T ‘SUP ME, SKANS. A LITTLE OVER TWENTY MINUTES AGO YOU SENT ME _THIS_!” The skeleton Lydia could only assume was Conrus had short, fluffy black hair (that Lydia desperately wanted to pet), pale skin, glasses, and was wearing a weird white and orange superhero costume of some sorts. Like Skans, only his face had skin the rest was just bone. Conrus held up his phone showing Skans something on the screen. 

“oh yeah, forgot about that. did you like the meme? i made it myself.” 

“THIS ISN’T A MEME, THIS IS A CURSED IMAGE- YOU NO WHAT FORGET IT. HAVE YOU SEEN ANY HUMANS? YOU KNOW IT IS MY GOAL TO CAPTURE ONE.” 

“nah, bro haven’t seen any but i’ll be sure to keep an eye socket out for any.” 

“SKANS, YOU BONEHEAD, IF YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE SKELETON PUNS AT LEAST MAKE THEM GOOD. 

“sorry, bro. didn’t realize that my puns are so good that they really... **get under your skin**.” Lydia could hear the sound of drums going “ba dum ching”. 

Conrus let out a disappointed sigh. “JUST REMEMBER TO RECALIBRATE YOUR PUZZLES, SKANS.” 

Conrus left making it safe for Lydia to get out from behind the weird lamp, she then approached Skans. 

“don’t worry about Conrus, kid he’s harmless (mostly). well i’ll be up ahead, see ya around.” Skans then went towards the door Lydia had just left through, barely a few minutes ago, the opposite direction of “ahead”. Lydia decided not to question it, today was already weird enough.

But the weirdness had barely begun. 

~~~

Turns out literally the only good thing about freezing in a forest somehow thriving in a cave and trying to solve a bunch of puzzles, just to get to the next section with MORE puzzles is that there are a lot of cute dogs. Sure the dogs may have been hired to kill you and steal your SOUL, but they usually give up after you pet them. 

Lydia and Sierra bumped into Skans and Conrus many times in said forest, each with Conrus presenting some kind of puzzle where the solution was way too easy or just didn’t work in some way. After Lydia “solves” the puzzle, Conrus would then leave to start preparing the next puzzle, while Skans would stay behind to talk to Lydia giving hints Lydia had already figured out herself while Sierra aggressively quoted vines to Skans. Sierra didn’t appear before Skans, just kind of made her voice project stuff like ‘ROAD WORK AHEAD?! YEAH I SURE HOPE IT DOES!’ Skans would sometimes finish the vines, not even bothered by Sierra’s ghost voice.

It took what felt like forever because of all the stops and puzzles in the way but Lydia finally reached a small town called Snowdin. Lydia went to the Shop to buy food, took a well deserved nap at Snowed Inn, talked to some residents in the town, and finally reached where Conrus was standing, waiting to battle her.

“HUMAN, I MUST TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOME COMPLEX FEELINGS THAT I AM FEELING.” Lydia didn’t realize Conrus COULD feel complex emotions. Sierra was making a face of pure and utter shock. Apparently neither did she. “I MEAN IT HAS BEEN MY GOAL FOR AS LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER TO FIND AND CAPTURE A HUMAN, BUT I’M SURE YOU WANT TO BE MY FRIEND! BUT I MUST BATTLE YOU! I’M SORRY HUMAN, BUT YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT YOU ARE VERY COOL.” Sierra didn’t know how anyone could think either of these people were cool, so she shrugged.

“I mean, I don’t know if it’s all the snow but I think that you’re really _cool_ too! *finger guns*” 

“*LE GASP* FLIRTING?!? SO YOU FINALLY REVEAL YOUR _ULTIMATE_ FEELINGS? WELL I AM A SKELETON WITH STANDARDS.” 

“I literally have no redeeming qualities whatsoever.” 

“OH S**T, YOU’RE MEETING ALL MY STANDARDS!!!” _wat?_ Sierra had stopped functioning by this point. She was too confused to keep up. 

“ALRIGHT HUMAN, WE DON’T HAVE TO BATTLE, I WILL SPARE YOU NOW. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO GO ON A DATE, MEET ME IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE, I’LL BE WAITING. NYEH, HEH, HEH!” Conrus basically floated above Lydia’s head and left towards his house.

“I don’t want to go on a date with him. Do I have to?” Lydia asked Sierra. 

Sierra shook her head a bit and got out of her state of shock before saying “I don’t care what you do, I’m just going to f*ck with his sense of reality.” 

“So I’m going on that date?” Sierra shrugs.

Lydia walked up to Conrus. “SO YOU MADE IT, YOU MUST REALLY WANT TO GO ON THAT DATE.” 

“Something somewhat similar to that I guess.” 

“WELL SINCE THIS IS OUR FIRST DATE I WANT TO TAKE YOU SOMEWHERE SPECIAL. SOMEWHERE I SPEND A LOT OF MY TIME.” 

“Ok, lead the way.” Conrus started walking towards town, Lydia had a hard time catching up since she has really short legs, especially compared to Conrus. He led them halfway into town before turning around and leading them back towards his house. “MY HOUSE!” he then walked inside leaving Lydia confused outside. 

When Lydia went inside Conrus started showing her around. He showed her Skans’ pet rock (which was covered in sprinkles from Conrus trying to feed it), he showed her his kitchen (the fridge was full of containers all labeled spaghetti [none seemed edible, Conrus is definitely not a good cook] and an empty bag of chips), and other things, weird things, I don’t feel like writing it all. I’m a good writer. Sierra petted the rock.

“SO IF YOU’RE DONE LOOKING AROUND, WE COULD GO TO MY ROOM AND.. DO WHATEVER PEOPLE DO WHEN THEY DATE?” 

“Or we could just stay down here?” Lydia was scared of where this was going, after all this is a fanfic and fanfics can get REALLY weird, but don’t worry, Lydia if this fanfic was a movie it would only be rated R because of swearing. Sierra laughed a bit since she was a ghost she had 4th wall powers.

Conrus’ room was cleaner than Lydia’s room had ever been. There was a car bed, a table covered in action figures, a flag with a skull and crossbones, a bookshelf, a desk with a computer on it, and a box of bones.

“YOU CAN LOOK AROUND IF YOU WANT.” Conrus said. Sierra took this opportunity and looked at everything in her range.  
  


Lydia decided to look at the computer first. Walking up to it Lydia noticed that the computer was opened up to a social media site called MonsterNet. 

“AH, THE INTERNET I’M QUITE POPULAR THERE, I’M JUST A DOZEN AWAY, FROM A DOUBLE DIGIT FOLLOWER ACCOUNT.” This declaration confused Lydia. “HOWEVER FAME HAS A STEEP PRICE. AN INTERNET TROLL HAS PLAGUED MY ACCOUNT, ALWAYS SENDING ME CURSED IMAGES OR BAD PUNS IN A GOOFY FONT.” Lydia had a feeling she knew who this troll was, and they happened to live in this very house. She didn’t say anything though, she didn’t want to be involved when Conrus finally did figure out that it was Skans trolling him. 

“But, uh, how are you a _dozen_ away from double digits?” Lydia finally got the courage to ask the question that had been plaguing her. 

“WHY, JUST LOOK YOURSELF!” Lydia looked back at the screen, Conrus was indeed a dozen away from double digit followers. Sierra was snickering at a My Little Pony plushie collection in the corner.  


“SO, BEFORE WE START THE DATE, I WOULD LIKE TO SHOW YOU MY SECRET DATE OUTFIT!” 

“Alright then.” Conrus disappeared into his closet for a moment before emerging again, wearing an outfit equally as ridiculous as his first. 

“BEHOLD, MY SECRET FASHION! DO YOU LIKE IT, HUMAN?” Lydia paused and tried to think of a reply. Luckily for Lydia, Sierra had a reply for her. 

All of a sudden Sierra tapped into some supernatural power to make some of Conrus’ books fall from his shelf, and with a booming voice she said “Boi you got less fashion game than a fashionably challenged Crocodile, who only wears socks with sandals and ugly sweaters.” Lydia did her best not to laugh as Conrus freaked out. When he asked Lydia if she saw that, Lydia just kept saying, “Nothing happened, why are you freaking out?” Throughout the exchange Sierra laughed her a$$ off. 

Before Conrus had the chance to ask her opinion on his outfit again Lydia suggested they start the date.

About halfway though the date Conrus declared that there was a secret to his outfit that Lydia had to find. 

“I bet that the secret is he’s gay.” Sierra whispered to Lydia.

“The fandom says he is.” Lydia whispered back. 

Sierra looked at Lydia before going “WTF, you were part of that mess?” Then Sierra decided to knock Conrus’ hat off just because she could and partly because the hat was a fedora. When the fedora fell, it revealed a plate of spaghetti! that was under his hat? 

“HUMAN DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS?” 

“Don’t tell me, is it spaghetti?” 

“YES! WHY DON'T YOU TRY IT??” Conrus held the plate out, waiting for Lydia to take it.

“I would rather eat tacos coated in glitter than that plate of spaghetti.” Somehow Conrus managed to take Lydia’s words as a compliment?

The date continued for only a short while after that, it was terrible. By the end of it Conrus even had the audacity to friendzone Lydia without ever actually letting her explain she only went on the date so _she_ could friendzone _him_. And also see Sierra mess with his sense of reality.

“DON’T WORRY, ONE DAY YOU’LL FIND SOMEONE AS GREAT AS ME. WAIT NO THAT’S NOT TRUE, BUT I’LL HELP YOU SETTLE FOR SECOND BEST! OH! AND, BEFORE I GO HERE’S MY PHONE NUMBER *THROWS PIECE OF PAPER INTO LYDIA’S FACE* YOU CAN CALL ME ANYTIME. PLATONICALLY THAT IS. WELL, GOTTA GO. NYEH HEH HEH!” Conrus left Lydia standing dumbfounded in the middle of his room. 

“WhAt JUsT HapPEneD?” Lydia asked, still standing in the middle of Conrus’ room.

Lydia went downstairs and started going past the kitchen when she realised that there was something wrong with the cabinet under the sink, well beside the fact that it was way too tall for anyone to be able to use the sink, the door led not to a cabinet but to another room. Lydia had to check this out. She stepped inside. 

“Whaaaat? What even is this place?” It was a rhetorical question, Lydia didn’t think even God would have an answer. 

“It’s a place.” Sierra answered.

The secret room was full of objects that looked like they haven’t seen the light of day in a long time, well nothing has since they’re underground but still they haven’t been out of this room in a while. Even spaghetti in a photo of Conrus looked like it was going bad, then again maybe it looks like that due to Conrus’ amazing cooking skills. It’s clear that this room is the place where lost stuff goes to die, how fun. 

The crowning glory of the room was in the back, two doors each the same color as Lydia’s switch controllers a lock shaped like a dog kept them firmly shut. Well as firmly shut as a poorly made lock that would probably fall off soon away could. Sierra tried to jiggle it in an attempt to make it fall off faster. It didn’t work.

“Well this place is fun,” Lydia’s statement was a good example of verbal irony. Sierra nodded. “Shall we leave this God forsaken place?” Sierra nodded. So they left, but Lydia knew she would probably come back later, she wanted to see what was behind the locked door. Well time to forget that that ever happened, just like that date.

Lydia walked past where Conrus had stood waiting to battle her and noticed how the temperature changed from freezing cold to room temperature. The scenery started changing too, from snowy forest to damp swamplands. 

Walking into a room the first thing Lydia noticed was a blue flower. Lydia walked over to it ignoring everyone else in the room and touched the petals lightly, “The only thing that gives my life meaning is explaining the echo flower, no one can know.” Did the flower just speak!? 

The monster standing next to the flower then spoke to himself. “Never trust a flower, that’s one of the constants in this world.” 

Lydia turned to him, “What’s this flower called?” 

“This is an echo flower, it repeats the last thing it heard, over and over,” the flower repeated the monster's words. “Neat, huh?” Lydia nodded.

Lydia finally acknowledged the other monsters in the room, a lizard-monster-child with no arms and Skans who was at a sentry, just chilling. Lydia walked up to the monster child first. 

“Yo, are you sneaking out to see her too? She’s amazing right? I’ll see you up ahead!” The monster child then ran off before Lydia could even process what the child said. 

Sierra turned to Lydia and said “What I got from that was that he’s a fanboy of some mystical being. I hope it’s the god of fish.” Is this foreshadowing?

Lydia realized she couldn’t stall talking to the weirdness that is Skans any longer, so she walked up to her. 

“what’s up nerd. it is i, skans. skans the skeleton. haha it rhymes.” It doesn’t? “you wanna go get some food kiddo?” Lydia nodded “aight. Follow me nerd. ima finna take u on a adventure.”

Skans got up from where she was sitting and started walking towards the area Lydia had yet to explore, but as soon as they entered the next room Lydia found herself in a pub. 

“What?” Lydia was confused but that’s nothing new. 

“Welcome to Aaron's,” Skans said, leading to two bar stools. After sitting down Lydia started looking around. All of the dog monsters she had fought before were all here, she should go pet them all later, and several other monsters she hadn't seen before, like a fish, a bird, a bunny, a moose?, and what even is _that_? 

“hey, kiddo fries or burgers?” 

“Uhh...fries.” 

“hey, that sounds pretty good. aaron we’ll take a double order of fries.” Lydia looked over to who Skans was talking to. They were a fire monster wearing a nice suit, he had glasses and a long brown ponytail, he also seemed to be done with everything.

When Aaron walked away, presumably to get the fries, Skans started talking again.

”so, what do you think of my brother? cool right?” 

“Well he’s certainly something.” 

“well you would be cool too if you wore the same outfit he wears everyday. he’d only take that thing off if he absolutely had too.” 

“Do you mean like a date? ‘Cause he took it off for the date we just had like five minutes ago.” 

“you went on a date with my brother?” 

“Yep, and I think I can honestly say it was the worst date I’ve ever been on.” 

“the f**k you say to me?” Skans’ eyes went from looking like normal human eyes to looking like empty sockets. How can eyes do that? It’s terrifying. Skans continued talking. 

“W-well you see it was pretty much the only date I’ve ever been on and Conrus friendzoned me at the end. So I think I deserve to say that it was the worst date I’ve ever been on.” Skans’ eyes returned to normal after that. “Plus I think he’s gay,” Lydia continued. 

  
“listen, kid you don’t even know what gay is. i’m gay.” 

“Fair enough.”

Aaron returned with the fries at this point. Lydia started digging in but Skans started talking again, but this time all the lights in the bar went out, and a spotlight shined on where Skans and Lydia sat. Lydia was too busy eating her fries to even notice or care. 

“hey, kid you ever heard of a talking flower?” 

Lydia didn’t want to be associated with the abomination that is Flowey so she answered: “Nope!” 

“well then, i’ll explain. the echo flower...” That wasn’t what Lydia was expecting. “...say something to them and they’ll repeat it over and over. pretty cool, huh?” 

“Yeah, I guess so, but what does that have to do with anything?” Lydia was done with her fries at this point and started eyeing Skans’ untouched plate. 

“well Conrus has mentioned that when no one else is around him, a flower appears and starts talking to him, whispering things. advice, flattery.. predictions. i think someone’s using an echo flower to play a prank on him.” 

“Or it could just be Flowey.” Lydia’s words muffled due to having a face full of fries, stolen from Skans’s plate. 

“wait, who’s flowey?” 

“This really weird flower monster. I didn’t mention him before ‘cause I didn’t want to be associated with him.” 

“hmm, well i’ll keep an _eye socket_ out for him.” 

Skans stood up to leave and Lydia turned to face her. “by the way, i’m flat broke. can you pay the bill? it’s only 10000G.” 

“What? Heck no! I would have to sell all my organs to pay for that! wait.” 

“heh, nice.” Skans said pointing finger guns at Lydia. 

“but don’t worry about it, kid i was just joking. hey aaron put it on my tab.” Skans then started heading for the door. 

“PAY YOUR F**CKING TAB SKANS!!” Aaron screamed the first words he had said the entire time Lydia was there. He then threw a plate in Skans’ direction, it shattered on the wall next to her.

Sierra randomly came in, no clue what she was doing, and projected her voice to say ‘yeah pay your f**king tab Skans!’ 

Aaron didn’t really know where the voice came from but proceeded to do finger guns in the perceived direction of the voice and said “Yeah what she said!” 

The food wasn’t really that expensive was it? Well, looks like Lydia knows how much money is on Skans’ tab.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is anyone disappointed that Sans and Papyrus are OCs? I guess if they are they can say that choice was a /mistake/ on my part!


End file.
